I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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