my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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