she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
should my penis look like a turkey
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
