so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize