Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
