Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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