I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Don't EVER smell your tampon
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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