So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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