I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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