she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize