I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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