you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
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