wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
This is the high leading the old right now
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
did you just send me my own nude
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
