how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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