its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
