So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize