yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
