I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
