I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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