If i come over, it means nothing
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
