At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
So apparently I’m into choking now
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