Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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