??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
