I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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