I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
