..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
