so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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