Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
