Plan B is the new Plan A
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'm getting married
To pizza
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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