Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
