awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
