Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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