Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Quick, to the slutcave!
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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