While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Randomize
