Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
