I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
