look no pants
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
