Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
