Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
