i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
