She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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