When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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