i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
