So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
