I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
