we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
