He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize