I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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