grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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