Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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