i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
